The Cheese Drawer

I’ve been meaning to tell this story for awhile because it’s outrageous in the best way possible.

In April Davy sprained a finger on his left hand playing basketball.  Obviously it swelled and because of that his wedding ring didn’t fit.

PAUSE. STOP. HOLD ON. I’m sure you’re thinking, “Melissa… you just had a baby and you’re telling us about Davy’s basketball injury from 6 months ago? Where are the baby details? Where are the cute pictures? Surely I didn’t click on this blog for some boring injury story.” Just be patient, I’m getting to all of the fun baby stuff. And in a weird way it all connects, I promise. 

Anyway, his wedding ring didn’t fit which meant he was wearing it on the pinky of his right hand. I bet you can see where this is going. A few days after this injury we headed back to Davy’s hometown for his high school’s alumni basketball game. We were cutting it close as we often do, but made it home in time to drop off our stuff and grab a snack, then it was off to the gym for all the festivities. 

I don’t know what kind of town you grew up in but the evening was about what you’d expect for a small town alumni game… concession stand food, a range of ages in the alumni department playing against the current team, medium sized crowd gathered to watch... a fairly typical event. [As a side note my husband looked pretty darn cute in his old uniform. I married a stud.] All I’ll say about winning and losing is that we should consider it a win that the alumni could still make it up and down the court (mostly) and that no one got injured.

It was a really fun evening and then at about 11 that night we realized that Davy’s wedding ring was missing. Yep. I’m sure you called that. We searched everywhere. We went back to the school. We enlisted the janitor’s help. We checked the car, the house, the driveway, anywhere we had been since arriving home. We retraced steps and the ring was nowhere to be found. And for 3 months it stayed nowhere to be found. We started looking for new rings online. Davy even ordered a new one, but at the last minute he realized he had ordered the wrong size so he cancelled the order.

A few days later, we were back at his parent’s house one afternoon and about to eat lunch. I was at the sink washing dishes and I hear Davy gut laughing behind me. I turn around and he’s holding up, yes…. his wedding ring. And where did he find it? Of all places the meat and cheese drawer in the refrigerator. Yes, you read that correctly. It was in the refrigerator. I could not believe it. We searched everywhere (well we thought so at least) and all that time it was sitting in the meat and cheese drawer.  Apparently when he went to grab a snack before the game it had slipped off in the refrigerator. We laughed for a really long time and then the overwhelming thought flooded my mind: “God loves me SO much.” That may sound silly, but I think moments like that are so clearly ridiculous that there really is no other explanation. Don't you have those sometimes? It may be a more something more significant, but sometimes it just is the little things that remind us how dearly we are loved.  

I am thankful for that moment because here’s a confession: lately I have really doubted his love. How could that be? How could I forget how loved I am when I have this beautiful baby boy? Get ready to see my ugly heart.  I’ve realized something about myself in the past 2 and half months: I want life to be easy and when it’s not I doubt that I am loved. I forget that God is good, that he wants good things for me, that he sees me. Sure its easy to remember I’m loved when life feels easy, when things are going MY way, when you find the ring in the cheese drawer, when I’m staring into the sweet little face of my smooshy baby. But do I choose to remember when life is hard? Do I remember when I’m walking through suffering or when my agenda gets thrown by the wayside or when that same smooshy baby won’t stop crying? No, I hate to admit it, but usually I do not choose to remember I am loved. Many times I let my circumstances dictate my view of the Lord and his love for me. Motherhood is hard. I'll admit I have not transitioned very well into the whole dying to myself and my desires for another person thing. Surely God wouldn't make me do something this hard right? 

Am I alone? Anyone else in this boat with me?

I must laugh because I feel like a small child throwing a tantrum when I don’t get my way or when life is hard. I imagine a future time when Aiden will ask me for something I know isn’t in his best interest. I will say no and he may throw a fit. Giving into his every desire is not loving. No, as his mother I will say no to some things BECAUSE I love him. Allowing Aiden’s life to be easy is not loving. No, as his mother I will let him struggle at times BECAUSE I love him. Learning to roll over or walk can be difficult and frustrating, but I have to let him work through that. He’d never learn or grow otherwise.

How much more does God do that for us? He is slowly making me more like Jesus by each circumstance I’m placed in. Even the hard ones… maybe especially the hard ones. For that I am grateful, even though my flesh resists with all its might.

I am humbled because my circumstances really aren’t even bad. Sure, I’m tired and some days are really difficult but there are so many Christians in the world that are dealing with true suffering that are still confident in God’s love for them. Dear friends of mine are walking through suffering right now. Life seems like its continually beating them down. And yet they are choosing to trust the Lord. They are choosing to believe what is true. I want to be that way. I want to remember that our circumstances are not an indicator of his love for us. Didn’t he already demonstrated his love for us? Romans 5:8 says, “But God demonstrates his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Shouldn’t that be enough?

My senior year of college I got a phrase from my favorite hymn tattooed on my foot. It says, “It is well with my soul. “ I think I have always loved that hymn because my heart is so prone to believe otherwise. If you know the story of the man who authored that hymn it is even more powerful (click here to read about it and see all of the lyrics). Perhaps my favorite part in the whole song is the lyric that says, “Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, It is well, it is well with my soul.” 

Whatever my lot… I want to be a woman who remembers she is loved despite her circumstances. I want to be as confident in God’s love for me as the day Davy found his ring. I want to rejoice over His love for me as much as that day: even when life is hard, even when its exhausting and full of interruptions, even when I don’t get my way.  So today I choose to remember the cheese drawer. And tomorrow when life doesn’t feel as good I still choose to remember the cheese drawer. And in the middle of the night when I am exhausted I still choose to remember the cheese drawer. Every single day it is well with my soul. Whatever my lot God is good and He and loves me. I think sometimes we just have to move the cheese out of the way and actually see it.

And now enjoy pictures of my baby. In my totally biased opinion the cutest baby in the whole world. :)

It's hard for me to believe he was ever that tiny. I was skeptical when moms would gush over their babies and get emotional when they'd say it goes too fast. NOW I GET IT. Seriously, it goes too fast. I had to laugh at myself the other day. I was getting emotional because I had to put away his newborn clothes and get out the next size up. Who am I? I used to be the girl that never cried. I didn't know my eyes could produce that many tears. The last 3 months have shown me otherwise.

He LOVES his animal mobile that my mom made him. It plays the song "You are my Sunshine." It's so cute how enthralled he is watching those animals go round and round. 

So far we have a cuddle bug on our hands. I hope that continues because I am LOVING it. Also, this picture makes my heart want to explode. I didn't know it was possible to love two people so much. 

This is his I'm done for the day face. I probably could have blasted heavy metal and he wouldn't stir.

This is his "make mommy/daddy/grandma/grandpa/anyone ever melt" face. I am NOT a morning person, but this face makes it worth it to get out a bed before 8:00 AM. I am loving his smiles. 

Here's another I'm done for the day pose. He loves doing that with his arms. Even when he's swaddled he finds a way to get those arms free. 

So there he is. Our sweet little Aiden James. He brings more joy to my life than I ever thought possible and I can't wait to see his personality emerge. I am beyond blessed to be his momma. 

September Prayer Letter

Fall Getaway

“Davy, I just got baptized!!” The group of students from MO Southern ran up to me, excitement plastered on each of their faces. They had just went to the river and Skyler, a freshman, had decided to be baptized.  

Last weekend 270 students from schools around the region (180 from our campuses) gathered at a campground to connect with Jesus. Many, like Skyler, re-surrendered their lives to Jesus in radical ways. Trey wants to be a light in his fraternity, Sami Jo wants to pour her life into younger students, Aaron and Spencer want to start a manhood study. …. God is moving friends. 

SPIRITUAL LEGACY

The speaker at Fall Getaway brought Davy on stage to show how  he had discipled Justin, who discipled Davy,  who disciples Spencer, who disciples Holden.  A spiritual multiplication chain that continues on!

Missouri Southern Update

We were so ecstatic that 11 students came to the retreat from MO Southern. We have been meeting weekly with 12 students who want to go deeper and multiply their lives during college. Davy has started leading a Manhood Bible study with several of the guys and we plan on launching seven new small groups in the spring. Pray for all God is doing in Joplin! 

Summer Missions

We just had to share this with you! Our regional leadership gathered all the numbers from Cru mission trips over the summer and put them in this graphic. We are not interested solely in numbers, but we rejoice because those numbers represent very real individuals that Jesus cares deeply about. 

Praise God for all the seeds that were planted and the many that surrendered their life to Christ. 

Please continue to pray for our partnerships in these overseas locations and the spiritual darkness that still reigns in many of these places.

AIDEN JAMES

Aiden is 2 months old. Time is flying! He is a healthy and happy baby. He has started smiling at us and rolling over from tummy to back (Yes, already. Yikes!)

WHAT'S NEXT?

Our social media evangelistic outreach will begin October 25th. Please pray for us this month as we prepare students to share their stories and create buzz on campus. We want many students to encounter Jesus. 

Prayer Requests

• Pray for the students that attended Fall Getaway. Pray that they would continue to pursue the Lord and that the friendships they developed there would deepen and point them to Jesus. 
• We will be doing a large evangelistic outreach at the end of this month. Over social media students will be sharing their story of coming to Christ. Please pray that these videos spark Gospel conversations with their friends and that many students come to Christ through this outreach.

HOW CAN WE PRAY FOR YOU? PLEASE FILL OUT THE FORM TO THE RIGHT AND LET US KNOW!

August Prayer Letter

Our Family of Three

We are delighted to introduce you to Aiden James McVicker. He was born on August 7th at 7:21 AM. He weighed 7 pounds 10 ounces and was 20.5 inches. We are sleep deprived but doing well and enjoying our sweet gift. He brings so much joy to us and our friends and family. Thank you for your prayers for all of us!

The First Weeks

508 students hearing the Gospel at our weekly meeting. We are running out of chairs, a great problem to have! Pray each student gets involved in a small group.

Athletes that are leading Bible studies on their teams gather in our home for a leadership meeting.  Their passion for reaching lost teammates is inspiring. Earlier that week 76 athletes attended our large group meeting. All but 2 teams were represented!

You're an Adult Now

Discipleship- God’s mandate for the church to spiritually multiply. I (Davy) am so thrilled to have the privilege of pouring into the lives of guys like Jonathan who want to take next steps in their faith and begin living out their beliefs as adults as opposed to just receiving and being taught. Jonathan is a junior who is leading a small group in a dorm on campus.  There were 16 underclassmen that showed up the first week! Pray for him and the other student leaders who balance ministry and their class schedule.

Missouri Southern 

In addition to working at Missouri State this year, we also get the privilege of launching a new movement at Missouri Southern State University. The first week 25 students came out to the weekly meeting. That was exciting, but what really got our hearts going was 15 of them signed up to be leaders with Cru this year! Please pray for these men and women as we train them to launch Bible studies in the coming weeks. Davy is meeting with 10 guys to coach and equip every Tuesday. 

Prayer Requests

• The semester is in full swing. Please pray for the students that our staff have shared the Gospel with. Pray that those who accepted Christ will plug into community and those who have not made that decision will surrender their lives to him.

• Pray for our family as we adjust to a new life with Aiden. Pray the Holy Spirit empowers us to love our son and each other well. 

• Pray for Fall Getaway coming up Sept. 25-27. This weekend retreat can be life changing for students.

July Prayer Letter

PRAISE THE LORD!

We are so happy to report that we have reached 100% of our monthly financial goal. Thank you for your financial and prayer support. We are incredibly excited to be back with our team at MSU for this school year. Thank you for making that possible and encouraging us through this process of raising support. Please stop right now and praise our amazing God with us for abundantly providing for this ministry. 

Our first staff meeting is August 5th. Please pray for us as we pray and plan for the upcoming school year. 

PRAYER CALENDAR

Please click here for the printable prayer calendar. We would be so blessed if you would use this calendar as a guide to pray daily for the month of August. We recognize that without the Spirit moving in the hearts of students, our efforts would be in vain. Please seek the Lord with us as we ask him for a bountiful harvest. 

SUMMER MISSION RECAPS

EAST ASIA - “We experienced God's gift of sending the Holy Spirit before us to 22 Asian students who are now followers of Christ.”

- Michelle and Brandon (fellow MSU Cru staff)

JUNEAU, AK - “God taught me about what it means to love people well and engage intentionally in a community of believers and nonbelievers alike.”

- Kayla (MSU senior, pictured above, center with the girls she mentored)

WALT DISNEY, FL - “God moved in and through our 50 students to reach their co-workers from 60 countries and 500 college campuses with the Gospel.”

- Tina (fellow MSU Cru staff)

SAN DIEGO CA - “God radically pulled me out of my unbelief and placed me in a community of men who are living a life on mission WITH God, inspiring me and empowering me to step into chaotic spaces and be the man God created me to be.”

-Spencer (MSU junior involved in Davy’s manhood Bible study)

IVORY COAST - “God showed me how to teach others about Christ and how to learn from other people about his love. Because of that I got to see 5 students accept Christ” 

-Michael (MSU junior also involved in Davy’s manhood group, pictured below, right with his Ivorian friend Ronald)

PRAYER REQUESTS

• Please pray for our staff team as we prepare for the school year. Pray for unity and vision as we plan how to best reach students. Pray for the Spirit’s guidance.
• Pray for Melissa’s dad as he recovers from a stay in the hospital. He is doing MUCH better, but please pray for complete healing. 
• Pray for the students still on summer mission. Many trips continue until beginning of August. Staff have stepped away to give students leadership opportunities. Pray that God would continue to use students to reach lost people. 

This is the last prayer letter before our son is born. Please pray for a safe delivery and health for mom and baby.  Pray also that God gives the ability to be the best parents we can to our little gift.


HOW CAN WE BE PRAYING FOR YOU? PLEASE FILL OUT THE FORM TO THE RIGHT AND LET US KNOW.

May Prayer Letter

Four years or forty?

Will our students continue to follow God and live on mission for the rest of their lives? This is a question we ask ourselves often. We don’t want students to just follow God and make an impact for four years during college. We want them to follow God and make an impact for the next forty years. We truly believe that the tools we are giving students during their time in college will help them for the rest of their lives. Sarah-Grace (pictured below, on the left) is a perfect example of this. Sarah-Grace served on our leadership team and in the Cru band during her time at Missouri State. She graduated this month with her Bachelors of Science in Nursing. Already she is looking for ways to invest. She started a women’s Bible study over the summer with a fellow Cru graduate. We asked Sarah-Grace how Cru has prepared her for life after college. She said, “Cru showed me how to share my faith in a simple way. It also encouraged me to boldly step out of my comfort zone.” Pray with us that all our graduates boldly step out of their comfort zones and impact the world around them for Christ.

Summer Missions

Cru students from all over the country are embarking on summer mission trips. In total 1,256 students are being sent as part of 112 international teams and 1,791 students are being sent as part of 64 stateside teams. We hope you are as encouraged as we are to hear that our nation’s college students are bringing the Gospel to the world. Please continue to pray for our students and staff that are all over the country and all over the world on summer missions trips. The group that headed to East Asia is pictured below. 

Summer Cru

Not all our students head out on grand overseas adventures or go back to their hometowns over the summer. Many students stay in Springfield and are making an impact! We got to attend a Summer Cru leader’s dinner this week. Seven students gathered together to brainstorm how they can engage their peers with the Gospel during the summer months. We are so excited these students have committed to helping their peers grow in their faith and reaching out to lost students. Please pray for these leaders as they trust God with their summer right here in Springfield. 

OUR FIRST ANNIVERSARY     

This month we celebrated one year of marriage! We got to spend 2 nights in a treehouse in Eureka Springs, AR. We couldn’t have asked for a better first year. Thank you for your prayers and support!

Prayer Requests

• We are at 84% of our monthly support needs.  Please pray we complete our support by July 1st so we can help out with Summer Cru. 
• This month we welcomed 2 new staff babies to our MSU staff team. Please rejoice with us and pray for our fellow staff members: Danny and Nicole and their twin baby girls.
• We have entered the 3rd trimester! Both mom and baby Aiden are still doing well. Please pray for our family in this final stretch of pregnancy. 

HOW CAN WE PRAY FOR YOU? FILL OUT THE FORM TO THE RIGHT AND LET US KNOW!

April Prayer Letter

Have you filled out our "Getting to Know You" sheet yet? If not, please click here to fill it out. It will only take a few minutes and helps us get to know you better. THANK YOU!

Night of Elegance

This past weekend we had our annual Night of Elegance. This is an event where the gentlemen of Cru show the women love and honor. The men serve the ladies dinner and provide entertainment (funny skits, songs, and dance numbers). For many of our girls, this is the first time any man has show them love without the expectation of anything in return. It’s so fun to see the girls light up as the Cru men show them the love of Christ. It’s an wonderful opportunity for the guys to step up as men and serve their sisters. Davy’s manhood Bible study did an excellent dance number and received a standing ovation from the 100 girls present! It was a spectacular evening.                             

Members of Davy’s manhood Bible study with some of the ladies that attended the evening. 

   

Ask the Lord of the Harvest

The need for more laborers is always present. Earlier this month fifty seniors (pictured above) from our region gathered in Colorado to receive training to become Cru  interns. Four of these fifty will be joining our team next year at Missouri State. They will serve alongside us as we share our faith, mentor, and train students in Southwest Missouri. Six of those fifty will be heading to Cote d’Ivoire, Africa, our overseas partnership, for a year. Praise the Lord of the Harvest for sending more laborers to college campuses in the states and all over the world!

We also are thrilled to share that thirty three of our students are heading all over the globe to share their faith this summer on Cru mission trips. We love these trips because students experience a greenhouse of growth in a short period of time. They get to live in close community with each other and put into practice all the things they are learning. Not only that but God uses them in huge ways to advance His kingdom. Students often come back from these summers ready to lead movements on campus. 

McBaby is a... BOY!

We are so excited to announce that in August we will be welcoming a baby boy to our family.  After the ultrasound, the gender was kept a complete surprise from everyone except our sister-in-law until our gender reveal party the next evening. We got to find out with family and friends as blue balloons and streamers rained down on us. Other than the exciting gender news we were happy to hear that our little man is developing perfectly and both momma and baby are healthy and doing well. Now McBaby finally has an actual name. We are happy to now refer to him as Aiden, which means “fire.” We pray that he becomes a passionate young man who sets the world on fire for Christ. 

Prayer Requests

• We are at 80% of our monthly financial support goal.  Please pray we finish next month so we can help out with Cru in Springfield this summer. 
• Pray for the students that will be leaving on summer mission trips with Cru next month. Pray God uses them in huge ways to advance HIs kingdom and uses their summers to grow and equip them in their faith. 
• Please pray for us as we prepare to become parents. Pray God equips us to be the best mom and dad for Aiden. 

HOW CAN WE PRAY FOR YOU? FILL OUT THE FORM TO THE RIGHT AND LET US KNOW!

Already Inadequate

I was talking with my mother in law earlier today about how I hadn't blogged in so long (other than our monthly prayer letter updates of course). Not that life hasn't changed dramatically... it has. Not that I haven't had thoughts about these life changes... I have. I guess I just hadn't quite figured out how to communicate it. And then tonight I lie in bed unable to sleep, which if you know me at all is quite something. I happen to be an excellent sleeper. I just felt the Lord saying, "get up and go write it down." Don't know why, but I guess today is the day.

So here are the late night musings of a soon to be first time mom. Let me preface this whole post by saying that I am absolutely thrilled to be a mom. I don't want anyone getting the wrong idea here. This is just me being honest about the tension in my heart as I enter into uncharted territories.

Motherhood was always on a pedestal for me. I admit I have idolized it. Two of the things I wanted most in life was to get married to wonderful man (check that one off the list! I've got me a keeper) and to have lots of babies. Well, in December we found out we were pregnant. I, of course, was overjoyed. And that bliss has stayed with me until recently. Don't get me wrong it's still there. I am SO excited to become a mom, but recently other thoughts have crowded in as well. Maybe it's because everything has become so much more real. Maybe that's because this little person finally has a gender (male) and a name (Aiden). Maybe it's because my belly is getting bigger and my shirts fit weird. Not that I'm complaining, any excuse to go shopping is great in my opinion. Maybe it's all these stretch marks that are appearing or the rib that's out of place and causing constant pain. Whatever the reason these last few months I've had the thought, "What in the world am I getting myself into? I'm not ready for this." Recently motherhood has fallen off its pedestal.

I look at the moms around me and think that there is no way I can do what they do.

• They can be incredibly sick, coughing up gross colors and yet they take care of their babies anyway. I don't want to do that. I want to lay and bed and make Davy bring me soup. 
• They get up all night to feed their baby or wake up early because their toddlers can't seem to sleep past 6. I don't want to be woken up before 9 AM. Did I mention what an excellent sleeper I am? Well that generally means 8+ hours of sleep. And I like it that way. 
• They deal with icky bodily functions. I don't want to clean up throw up. I don't "do" throw up.
• They sacrifice for the good of their kids. I don't want to sacrifice. I liked my life the way it was. 
• They prioritize family over ministry. I love my job. The girls I disciple felt like children to me. How do I give some of that up? How do I change diapers and wipe boogers with joy when right now I'm thinking I'd much rather meet with girls on campus?

Do you all of a sudden turn into a selfless superwoman when they place that baby in your arms for the first time? Because as I look at all the moms around me I already feel inadequate. All those selfish thoughts above have run through my mind as I've thought about this transition into motherhood. I love my life. Just the way it is. Am I really ready to do this? 

And just as any loving father should, in these panicked moments, God reminds me that he isn't interested in my adequacy. His love for me isn't dependent on anything I do. I know these moms I look at aren't perfect. I'm sure many of those same thoughts cross their minds as they are cleaning up throw up or giving up something they love for the sake of their kids. I know these moms live moment by moment by the grace of God. There is no such thing as superwoman; just broken women living dependent on the Holy Spirit for power for today. 

That's hard for me. I want to be superwoman. And if not superwoman, I want to at least be adequate. God has had this funny way of changing my life the moment I get too comfortable. To give you a snapshot of the last few years: I've completely changed my career goals, raised financial support to be a missionary (something I prayed as a child God would never make me do), gone to Africa four times (something else I prayed against), got married, raised support again, and now am expecting a baby. It seems like just when a season of life gets comfortable, when I'm finally feeling like I've got things under control, getting good at life, God swoops in and changes everything. It's his loving way of saying, "Melissa, I'm not interested in how good you can be at life. I want you to trust in me. The goal isn't adequacy. The goal is dependence." 

Well here we are again: at this crossroads of choosing dependence, of choosing to be inadequate and letting the Spirit empower me for the day's tasks. I know many of you are in this boat with me. Maybe it's not motherhood, but something else. Let us be encouraged by Paul's words in 2 Corinthians 12:7-10.

"So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

Yes, I am already inadequate, but his grace is sufficient for me. In that, I will rest.