When "Thank You" Isn't Enough

This past month has held a lot of “lasts.” Last athlete’s Bible study. Last Cru meeting. Last staff gathering. As we wrap up here and start looking to the future I’ve been faced with the incredible journey I’ve been on in Springfield.  I went out to my favorite place in the world, sat in a hammock, and reflected on all the people God put in my life during my 8 years here. The words, “thank you” seem too weak to express the gratitude in my heart. This is my attempt to say to you what you have meant in my life.

To Armand: last month I got to stand in front of the MSU athletes and tell them how that whole thing got started. I walked into a room with 5 people sitting in a circle, having no idea how much my life would change in that room. Now when I look at that group, sometimes of 70+ people, I smile thinking about what started so small. I was at a point in my life where I was so lost. You helped me understand the Gospel for the very first time and for that I am (literally) eternally grateful. I don’t think you even realize at times what an impact you made in my life. You were just doing your job and it may not have seemed like much at the time, but there were athletes putting their faith in Christ this year because you were faithful all those years ago. Thank you for bringing me out of darkness and into light.

To that 1^st FCA group (Sarah, Ramie, Kelsey, Devin, Jay, Jody, Wes, Steph, and Jenna): I loved our community. I loved studying the word with you, playing Nertz with you, and sharing meals with you. Thank you for your friendship and showing me that it was possible to keep my faith in college.

To Maddi: my first discipler… before I even knew what that was. You loved me like Christ loves. I was messy, but you showed me grace. Thank you for helping me understand that I could never earn God’s favor.  You were always so real with me and I think that gave me the freedom to be real too. You took the Gospel from the abstract and made me see what it actually looked like in real life. Thank you for laying a foundation of Gospel truth in my life.

 To Jacqueline: my fellow Oregonian, you stepped in when Maddi left and I knew right away that if Armand picked you as a wife you were something special. I was so right. You poured into me during a time that I got to take so many steps of faith. You taught me how to share my faith, how to disciple, how to live life on mission not just for my college years, but for the rest of my life. Thank you for walking with me through a really hard senior year. You were a comfort to me and helped me have an eternal perspective.

To Randy and Mo: one Saturday a friend asked me to come out to “Hidden Bluff” and stucco an African village. I left that day sunburned with cut up hands having NO clue just how influential you two would be in my life. Your house and that grassy field are a place of refuge for me, a place I feel safe, and is probably my favorite place in the world. House church in your basement changed me in more ways I can count. Thank you for giving me a passion to see lost people around the world reached with the Gospel. I was the girl that prayed as child that God wouldn’t make me be a missionary overseas. If I’m moving to Africa it’s because God used you two to give me a heart for the nations. Thank you for introducing me to place that holds pieces of my heart. I will never forget our trip to Mali. You have been there in my college years, transitioning into full-time ministry, pre-marital counseling, our wedding in that grassy field, and everything in between. I love you both so very much.

To Finch and Kelli: I remember we were supposed to meet up to talk about my future plans and it snowed buckets. Springfield was shut down, but you braved the snow to pick me and Lizzy up in your truck. You took us to Panera and we sat and talked about interning, something I NEVER thought I would do. Thank you for seeing whatever you saw in me. If you hadn’t asked, I never would have interned or joined staff. Which means I probably wouldn’t have met Davy or any of the other wonderful people I now call friends. Interning and being on staff with Cru at MSU have been the best years of my life so far. Thank you for challenging me to take that step of faith. Kelli, to you especially, thank you for opening your home to me. Your house is also a place of refuge and safety for me. I wouldn’t have wanted my bridal and baby showers at any other place. It was perfect that they were there because I treasure every moment I’ve gotten to spend there with you.

To Cami: When I entered your classroom on the first day of student teaching I wasn’t too sure about the whole teaching thing. Maybe it was the education classes I was taking or senoritis, but I was so unsure how that semester would go. That semester with you in your classroom was my favorite semester in college by far. Thank you for restoring my love of teaching, showing me how to be a great teacher, modeling what being a Christian in a secular environment looks like, being an advocate for me in the district, inviting me to Christ Community with your family, and supporting me in my work with Cru. You made the decision whether to teach or intern so difficult because every day in your class was a joy. I don’t know if I’ll work for Cru forever, but if I don’t I know that I am well prepared to be a teacher and that is because of you. You have been so much more than just my cooperating teacher. Thank you for always being so supportive of me, in whatever I have chosen to do. Also, we dressed up as grapes and that was amazing... even though we couldn't sit down. 

To the Manor Ladies Round One (Chrissy, Kelsey, Lizzy, Carrie, and Tina): BEST. YEAR. EVER. The mandle, the clern, all the pranking, family time, making our epic Halloween costumes, and watching Top Gear and cartoon X-Men. That year with you all will go down in history as one of my favorite years of life. I learned what Christian community is supposed to look like. Thank you for encouraging me, pointing out sin to me, loving me, and laughing with me. I have loved every second of our Manor shenanigans. You are all so dear to me and I love that whenever we see each other, even though so much has changed, we pick up right where we left off. Sometimes I wish I could rewind and live that year all over again. 

To Lizzy: I still laugh about how completely different we are. We may be total opposites, but I couldn’t have asked for a better best friend. Thank you for being the perfect balance of grace and truth, challenging me in my faith, and encouraging me to pray. I think back often to sharing a room with you… how we could never go to bed early because we’d stay up late talking, our no talking before 10 AM rule, juggling practice, and our daily journal questions. Davy had a lot to live up to when we got married because you were the BEST roommate and friend. Your friendship has formed so much of who I am and I hope someday, somehow we live in the same city again… heck, I’d even take the same state at this point. J

To the Manor Ladies Round Two (Christa, Lizzy again, Tracy, Laura, Jessica, and Sarah): I loved this year in the Manor too. It was such a joy to celebrate with you as I walked through life transitions. Thank you for being so excited for me and for supporting me as Davy and I went from dating to engaged to married. I love that the Manor shenanigans lived on with ya’ll. Also, Halloween for the WIN. Seriously, we rocked that. Life was so rich and so fun with you as my roomies.

To Nicole and Danny: I cried when you guys moved out of your old house. Granted I was pregnant and hormonal, but still…. I have so many fond memories in that house. You two are some of the most hospitable people I have ever met. Thank you for welcoming me into your home, but more importantly your lives. I have learned so much about marriage, ministry, and parenting by watching you. Thank you for not sugar coating life, but being real and open. I see the Gospel lived out in your life and value your advice more than you know. When I think about leaving Springfield, I DREAD saying goodbye to you guys because I have treasured our friendship. I love you guys and your sweet little family.

To Kate and Justin: I remember hearing that Finch and Kelli were transitioning to other roles in Cru and that we were getting new directors, the Stringers. I’ll admit I was bummed, but I had no clue just how influential you two would be in my life. Looking back now I have to laugh, because I can’t imagine my life without you two in it. Justin, thank you for empowering me to be my best self. You not only encourage my gifts in ministry but help me prioritize my relationship with the Lord. You probably have ruined every other boss for me because I can’t imagine anyone topping you. Although, technically you’re still our boss as we go to Cote d’Ivoire… so that’s kind of awesome. Kate, where do I even begin? You have been the voice of grace in my life. Thank you for teaching me to have grace for myself in ministry, marriage, and motherhood. Your friendship has brought so much joy to my life. Thank you for being real and honest with me. You are a safe place and have allowed me to live in the light. And I have to thank you both for bringing Davy into my life. I know he wouldn’t be the man he is today if not for you two and I am SO SO SO thankful. You two called us getting together before I even did and I’m grateful for the role you’ve played in our relationship. Kate, I'm also still blown away by your pie eating abilities. 

To Mom and Dad: There are not words to express my gratitude for all that you have done this year. I don’t know why this transition was so hard for me. Maybe I wasn’t prepared. Maybe it was all the transitions crammed into 2 years of marriage. Or maybe I’m just more sinful than the rest. Whatever it is I couldn’t have survived this year without you. Thank you for selflessly giving of yourselves every single day. I am going to miss you both more than I can express. They say the best parents make the best grandparents and that is so true. Aiden is so blessed. And so am I.

As I get ready to leave this place I thank God for each you. What a beautiful story God has written for me. I am so grateful you have been a part of it.