We Were Made for Relationship

This is the talk I gave at the athletes' Bible study last week. Hope you enjoy!

This semester we’re doing a study called “backstory.” At Cru we believe it’s really important that we know the Bible. I know some of you guys are familiar with Bible stories. We know of Noah building the ark, David killing the giant Goliath, Moses parting the Red Sea, Jesus doing miracles and eventually dying on the cross and rising from the dead. All these stories seem to be unrelated right? Sometimes the Bible seems like the random compilation of stories, but this semester we’re going to see that all these stories connect to the same common thread: Jesus. We’ll see that the Bible isn’t just a random assembling of stories but it’s actually one cohesive story that allows us to better understand God. We’re going to be talking about different common themes that we see throughout God’s word over this semester. They are intimacy, betrayal, anticipation, pursuit, sacrifice, invitation, and reunion.

Tonight's topic is intimacy. Now I bet some of you are like, “what? We’re talking about what? I thought Christians didn’t talk about sex.” Well some Christians do. In fact our director Justin will be talking about sexuality in an upcoming Thursday night Cru talk. But sexuality is not what I’m talking about tonight. In our culture the word intimacy has taken on sexual connotations. But it is much, much more than that. It includes all the different dimensions of our lives. Yes, the physical, but also the social, emotional, mental, and spiritual aspects as well. Intimacy really means total life sharing. Some synonyms are closeness, inseparability, familiarity, and nearness. If you look throughout the entire Bible you’ll see that God’s desire for you and me is that we would have intimacy with him.

I know guys and girls think differently about these things but I also know that ALL of us at one time or another desire to be close with another person. We long to be understood, loved, and accepted. We seek out meaningful friendships with people who share our interests, with people who are loyal, with people that genuinely care about us. We long for our families to have healthy relationships. We want dating relationships that are deep. We are relational beings. Because that is the way that God designed us to be. Turn with me to Genesis 2:18-25.

The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” Now the Lord God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man. That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.

So you guys know the story. God spends five days forming the world and everything in it. On the sixth day God creates all the animals and living creatures that are on earth. And then he creates man: his masterpiece; the absolute best that he had. Nothing else in all creation was created in God’s image. As beautiful as mountains are, as amazing as some of the animals in the world are, as powerful as the ocean is… none of them quite measure up to us. Why? Because we created in God’s image. We were designed to reflect the beauty of our creator. So God looks at his masterpiece and says, “this is good. But what isn’t good is that man would be alone.”  Why is that? I bet a lot of you guys are wondering the same thing. You’re thinking, “God you gave us women and they have been nothing but trouble!” But seriously, why?  Why wasn’t it good that man should be alone? I think there are a couple reasons:

• First, because we only reflect the image of our creator one single person could not have all the attributes that God has. I get to see the character of God through numerous people with their different personalities and spiritual giftings. We don’t have it all. We’ve got a piece and other people have pieces. And combined we get to see a fuller picture of our creator. 
• Second, the God we serve is relational. I can’t adequately explain the doctrine of the trinity in the time we have tonight, but we serve one God existing in three persons, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. If you look back in Genesis 1:26 it says, “Let us make man in our image, in our likeness.” From the beginning of time God is relational so it makes sense that we, created in his image, would also be relational. 
• And third, it brings God glory. When we love and serve each other God is glorified. And God uses people in our lives to bring us joy and to bring us closer to him. 

So for those three reasons and probably many, many more God decided it was not good for man to be alone. God in his goodness decides Adam needs a helper that is fit for him. So Adam is watching all the animals go by naming them, “Aardvark, Arachnid, Armadillo…” He gets all the way through and none of them were worthy of an intimate relationship. So God puts Adam into a deep sleep and creates Eve. A helper that was worthy.

But here’s what we do. We take created things and put them above the creator. We take relationships and intimacy with people and look to that to satisfy what only God can. Tim Keller is a pastor in New York. He wrote a book called Counterfeit Gods. It’s about exactly that: how we take good gifts the Lord gives us and places them above God. We take the incomplete joys of this world and build our entire lives on them. Yes, we were created for relationship; first and foremost with God and secondly with people. We were created for intimacy. The God of the universe wants to know you. He wants to be known by you. He has called you by name and desires a deep, intimate relationship with you.

Some of you here maybe don’t have a relationship with God. That’s ok. We are so glad you are here. This is one of those things you have decide: “do I want this? Do I want a personal relationship with God?” If you do we’d love to talk with more about what that looks like. There is a card under your seat and if you fill out the info we will get in contact with you so we can talk about what it means to have a personal, intimate relationship with Jesus. 

Some of you might be struggling with your relationship with God. You say, “I get that I was made for intimacy with God and I want that, but I just haven’t been feeling it. I don’t know how to make it better.” I want to give you my favorite quote from Tim Keller’s book. It says, “The only way to free ourselves from the destructive influence of counterfeit gods is to turn back to the True One.” I encourage you to examine your relationship with him. You might be struggling because you’re looking to some outside source to give you what only God can. He desires intimacy with you and the solution isn’t try harder or sin less or be a better Christian. The solution is to run to Jesus. Talk to him. Tell him that you’re struggling. Ask him to turn your heart away from counterfeit gods and help you develop you intimacy with him.

Some of you may be doing fine with God but are struggling in your relationships with people. You know you were made to be in relationship with others, but that’s not always easy. Its not always easy to let people in. It’s not easy to deal with peoples’ sin. Or your own sin for that matter. Relationships are never easy. They’re messy and hard. But God created us to be relational beings so they must be worth it. If you’re struggling with some of your relationships whether that be with your family, friends, teammates, coaches, boyfriends, girlfriends let me encourage you to change the way you think about them. Many times the tension I experience in relationships comes because I view them as a means to benefit me. How can you make me happy? How can you serve me? How can you make my life better? Rather than thinking of relationships as a means to benefit myself I should look for ways to serve and love others. Relationships with others are hard. That’s a fact but it’s harder when we put unfair expectations on people and try to get from them things only God can give us.  Yes, they are difficult, but they’re worth fighting for.

Chances are that you are struggling in either your relationship with God or a relationship with another person. My challenge for you tonight is to not be okay with that. I know a lot of times it’s easier to just let those things go. It’s easier to watch a movie or take a nap or play XBOX than it is to take time out of your day to read the Bible and pray. Intimacy is not one-sided. God knows you fully but you’ll never experience intimacy with him unless you spend time getting to know who he is. I can’t expect to know Kiley if I never talk to her or see her or listen to what she has to say. The same is true with God. If we want to know him we must take the time to learn about who he is and learn how to listen to him. We were created to have intimacy with God and when we don’t you are seriously missing out. On the flip side I know it’s easier to not work on hard relationships or deal with difficult people. But it is not good for man to be alone. You were created to be in relationship with others. And God has placed certain people in your life for a reason. Don’t miss out on God’s good gifts because you want to take the easy road.

I can think of two eternal things in this world: our relationship with God and our relationship with others. The only thing that’s going to matter after we’re dead is if we had a relationship with Jesus and what we did on earth with our relationships with people. Did we love them well? Did we serve them? Did we point them to Jesus? Maybe that’s why in Mark when Jesus is asked by a teacher of the law what the greatest commandment is he says, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these.” You were created for intimacy. From Genesis to Revelation we see that God’s design is intimacy.